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Humility and Empathy
How to cultivate love of others in a narcissistic society
I keep thinking about an article I read recently by Darcia Narvaez. In it, she talks about humility. She says that to be humble is to be modest, selfless, and respectful with a world view that is both trusting and prosocial. Narvaez quotes researchers Michael Spezio and Robert Rogers who define humility as an openness to others. They also identify the following traits:
- Positive expressiveness in relationship
- Regulation of self-oriented emotions
- An accurate view of the self
- Interdependence
Instead of interdependence, however, what we see in the United States is a hyper-focus on independence and self-determination, even at the expense of others. In fact, the US was found to be the most narcissistic, or self-centered, among six societies. Regulation of self-oriented emotions and an accurate view of the self can be difficult in a society like this, which so fiercely values the individual.
Empathy
One antidote to narcissism, or self-centeredness, is empathy, an awareness of the feelings and emotions of other people. It is a key element of emotional intelligence. Empathy is different than sympathy, which is feeling “for” someone. Empathy is feeling “with” someone, often…
